Behold The Two Dirtiest FBI Reports Ever

AUGUST 24--FBI reports are usually a tough read due to arcane acronyms, liberal redactions, and a narrative style that would be charitably described as drab.

But occasionally Freedom of Information Act requests will unearth those rare bureau memos that crackle (and by “occasionally” we mean every decade or so).

Here are two of TSG’s favorite FBI reports, salacious gems created during the course of some 1975 investigation being handled by the Memphis field office.

Agents--whose names were the only things redacted from the documents--were dispatched to the Lamar Theatre on two separate occasions to view X-rated movies to apparently determine whether the films were obscene.

A pair of G-Men paid $3 apiece to watch a double feature of “Two Into Two” and “The Magic Mirror.” With seven other cinema fans in attendance, the agents took careful notes about what was unspooling. Their subsequent report includes a scene-by-scene recitation of the films, which seemed to be short on plot, but action-packed.

On another occasion, two agents went to the Lamar to watch “Penthouse Party Girls” and a second film that had no title or credits. The latter production featured airplane pilot “Dick O’Toole,” and passengers named “Holly Wood,” and “Justice Peace.” As detailed by the federal agents, Wood revealed that she “owns a string of whorehouses” and was traveling to Georgia to recruit “sweet country girls to work for her.” Peace, of course, then informed her that he happened to own massage parlors.

There was no indication in other released records that the FBI probe actually resulted in the filing of criminal charges against producers of the respective films or operators of the Lamar, which has since been shuttered (though its marquee remains). (13 pages)