Pathetic Adult Novelty Store Thief Made Getaway In Dodge Minivan, Cops Say

An unidentified man not only stole a $50 sex toy from an Indiana adult novelty shop, but he made his getaway Sunday afternoon in a Dodge minivan, police report.

The suspect, cops say, entered the Exotica store in Evansville “carrying his own bag,” into which he placed the stolen item, a “Bangin’ Betty” masturbator. The device, which resembles a woman’s rear end and genitalia, features a “dual-entry design” and interior “nubs and ribs for the ultimate in pleasure,” according to its manufacturer.

Additionally, the “left cheek” of the “Bangin’ Betty” has a “rose tattoo for a lifelike touch.”

A female employee followed the man as he left with the masturbator (setting off the store’s alarm in the process). As the thief slid behind the wheel of a red Dodge Caravan, the worker knocked on the minivan’s window. “But the suspect ignored her, started the vehicle and then left the scene,” police noted.